this is meeeee....
beginnings
life with my triplets
and now,
single motherhood
looking into an uncertain future
life with Ehlers-Danlos, thoracic outlet syndrome, and all the complications of the EDS Dx
navigating life with C-PTSD
the last couple of years brought information of a genetic condition, it immediately (within weeks!) took my mom away from me, and then my father failed to thrive without the love of his life. their love story is so inspiring and loving, i take solace in their togetherness.
my own love story wasn't what i thought it was, isn't going where i thought it would. my parents, family, friends tried to warn me... but we don't always listen to those we should. if so many people sense anger and resentment from your partner, listen. new beginnings without a toxic partner has appeal, but with children the toxic ex is still able to infect this new sought life...
how do we navigate starting over when we have to drag the ugly along with us in some form or fashion?
when you've faced your biggest fears and survived, it seems to bring on a power gathering sojourn.
it also feels like the edge of a cliff, one misstep and, done. my parents were amazing people and my marriage created the family of my dreams.
perfect... until the imperfections come and take it, not without victims. the situation where i lost my parents and the person i had children with, chose the few months window between these deaths, to bail. her prerogative, no shame in changing your route when you find it no longer serves. there are victims. leaving a family who already faces the trauma of loss beyond understanding, says a lot. my kids and i will pick up, we will form a stronger familial bond, what happens to the other half of their lives?
in my world compassion speaks volumes, i don't want to be pessimistic, but i do feel alone in my compassion well more often than i want to.
beginnings
life with my triplets
and now,
single motherhood
looking into an uncertain future
life with Ehlers-Danlos, thoracic outlet syndrome, and all the complications of the EDS Dx
navigating life with C-PTSD
the last couple of years brought information of a genetic condition, it immediately (within weeks!) took my mom away from me, and then my father failed to thrive without the love of his life. their love story is so inspiring and loving, i take solace in their togetherness.
my own love story wasn't what i thought it was, isn't going where i thought it would. my parents, family, friends tried to warn me... but we don't always listen to those we should. if so many people sense anger and resentment from your partner, listen. new beginnings without a toxic partner has appeal, but with children the toxic ex is still able to infect this new sought life...
how do we navigate starting over when we have to drag the ugly along with us in some form or fashion?
when you've faced your biggest fears and survived, it seems to bring on a power gathering sojourn.
it also feels like the edge of a cliff, one misstep and, done. my parents were amazing people and my marriage created the family of my dreams.
perfect... until the imperfections come and take it, not without victims. the situation where i lost my parents and the person i had children with, chose the few months window between these deaths, to bail. her prerogative, no shame in changing your route when you find it no longer serves. there are victims. leaving a family who already faces the trauma of loss beyond understanding, says a lot. my kids and i will pick up, we will form a stronger familial bond, what happens to the other half of their lives?
in my world compassion speaks volumes, i don't want to be pessimistic, but i do feel alone in my compassion well more often than i want to.
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